Sincerity / Sarcasm

by Collapsing Opposites

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released February 12, 2004

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Collapsing Opposites Vancouver, British Columbia

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Track Name: An Introductory Treatise on the Concepts of Sincerity and Sarcasm
Parody is a useful technique.
Critique what you don’t believe.

Sincerity is a fine way to be.
Personally, it made me happy.
Track Name: try, trying, don't try, not trying, effort - Try
Don’t try to be too critical.
Don’t try to be analytical.
Don’t try to be political.
Don’t try to be liberal.
Don’t try to be discursive.
Don’t try to be representative.
Don’t try to write meta-narratives.
Don’t try to be conservative.
Don’t try! Try! Try! Try!

Don’t try to be a feminist.
Don’t try to be a humanist.
Don’t try to be an artist.
Don’t try to be a realist.
Don’t try to be humanitarian.
Don’t try to be libertarian.
Don’t try to be a librarian.
Don’t try to be agrarian.
Try! Try! Try! Try!
Try! Try! Try! Try…
Track Name: Honesty
They say that classical is good for the brain
and heavy metal is slightly inane.
They say sincerity is hip this year
and sarcastic cynicism ain’t coming back, I fear,
because honesty sells records the most.
And, I should get some sandals, because I’m from the West Coast.
But, every single thing I ever said was a lie.
And all along every word to every song
that I sang wrong, for right or for wrong, was a lie.

They say that cynicism is good for the brain –
also for pleasure, progress and pain.
They say sincerity is hip this year
and sarcastic cynicism ain’t coming back, I fear.
But, there must be more to this life than herds.
There must be more to truth than words.
But every single thing I ever said was a lie.
And all along every word to every song
that I sang wrong, for right or for wrong, was a lie.
Track Name: SM
When rebellion became a cliché
but the teenagers would not go away,
we needed something to do
and it sounded a bit of tune.
Steven Malkmus,
riding on the city bus,
at the right place at the right time with the right face and the right rhymes,
and he became a voice for the rest of us.

When the nineties had been gone for a while
and the eighties came back in style,
Pavement was only a joke
as all their cred went up in smoke.
Steven Malkmus,
riding on the tour bus:
the butt of all in-jokes like “a frat boy in a rock pose,”
but he was still cool to some of us.

In eight or nine years from now,
when The Rawks get too watered down,
the nineties will be retro
and we’ll need some sort of hero.
Steven Malkmus,
riding on the city bus:
when all is said and done you’ll be on page ninety-one
of the rock and roll history textbook.
Track Name: JAC
She said if there is a God and he has a middle name,
the initial surely would begin with the letter A.
Then, I said I thought that she was very pretty.
But she said, “stop stalking me, or else I will call the police.”

I know that there is no long-term potential.
I know that there is no one out there just waiting for me.
I know that there is nothing to do but keep on thinking.
I know that there is nothing to do but keep on drinking.
I know that there is no Jesus Christ.
I know that there is no paradise.

Every night I pray to God so He can get me off this rock
but all I get are dogs and cops and notes saying “please won’t you fuck off.”
Janitor in the monastery is such a good way to make money,
but you know, at the end of the day you’ll be in exactly the same place.

I know that there is no career potential.
I know that there is no one out there just waiting for me.
I know that there is nothing to do but keep on thinking.
I know that there is nothing to do but keep on drinking.
I know that there is no Jesus Christ.
I know that there is no paradise.

Well, here’s a lesson I’ve learned well – if you would like, I can tell.
Never speak of what you feel, or else they’ll put you in jail.
Honesty ain’t meant to be more than an ad on TV.
And if I tell you I’m in love, you will crush me like a bug.
If I tell you I’m in love, you will crush me like a bug.
If I tell you I’m in love, you will crush me like a bug.
Track Name: Peptalk
You might be selling high energy cereal with a picture of a runner on the cover.
But that does not mean that if I buy it I will get much better.

You might be glowing from your new religion that you found at the convention in Seattle.
Now you’ve done converted all the chief executives and the chairs of the committees that matter.

You might be bragging about your Filipino bride that you ordered on the internet.
You’re gonna have a baby, but if you’re both happy, that’s fine with me, I guess.

But you don’t need a pep talk from a motivational speaker.
Just because he won a gold medal, that doesn’t make him a hero.
Track Name: Saddam Hussein
On the day they captured Saddam Hussein
I could not complain. I could not say anything!
All were very happy, parading ‘round the TV,
but I had laryngitis stuck in the bed.
September Eleventh made us lose our patience
in anything that criticizes our world!
Sing about the rain and sing about the trees and
sing about the beach. It’s oh so passionate.

Every single time I try to write a happy song,
something always goes wrong. Something messes it up.
A little falsetto or a slightly wrong note,
I cannot resist the tone of that bitter sarcasm.
English teacher said, “for your story to be read,
you must include a little dread. Something must get fucked up!”
It happens when you edit: always have to change it.
Heaven, we won’t let it come. It’s a lie.

They say you are born with an empty blank page:
eleven by eight. You can do anything!
Little kids are so bright, drawing little sunshines.
This was brought to you by our corporate sponsors.
If you could just be you and bullies wouldn’t bother you,
there’d be nothing to do but swim and praise God.
But, just like Charles Darwin, and just like Joseph Stalin,
and just like Ira Gershwin, you will leave your mark!
Track Name: Buffalo
A hundred and fifty years ago, back in the fur trade…
That is when our ancestors killed to make a state.
And so long to the buffalo grazing on the plains!
So long to the people who liked to eat their brains!

And, the geographers were right
(new professors basking in the limelight).
You might say that it seems trite.
That’s because you’re looking back in hindsight.

Only just ten years ago on the Atlantic Coast…
That’s when the fishes, you know, they were toast.
And so long to the ocean too, and all of you within!
So long to the people who never learned how to swim!

And, the geographers were right
(new professors basking in the limelight).
You might say that it seems trite.
That’s because you’re looking back in hindsight.

Only just ten minutes ago someone right outside
asked me for some money so that they could get by.
And so long to the people who have no equity!
So long to those of you with no industry!

And, the geographers were right
(new professors basking in the limelight).
You might say that it seems trite.
That’s because you’re looking back in hindsight.
Track Name: Artsy / Seriously
It’s so hard to take anything seriously when all you see around you is everything artsy fartsy.

It’s so hard to take anything artsy fartsy when all you see around you is everything seriously.